


Borderline

by occultclysms



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Bisexuality, Coming Out, Fluff, Kissing Lessons, Love Confessions, M/M, Road Trips, Roommates, Trans Male Character, Weddings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-05
Updated: 2020-11-05
Packaged: 2021-03-08 21:14:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,114
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27263302
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/occultclysms/pseuds/occultclysms
Summary: Jaehyun gets invited to his cousin's wedding in the countryside and needs a date, but the only person available is Jaehyun's roommate, Sicheng, who thinks Jaehyun is straight and just needs to be a bit more comfortable with physical affection for them to sell it, but Jaehyun's actually bi and might be catching feelings for Sicheng.
Relationships: Dong Si Cheng | WinWin/Jung Yoonoh | Jaehyun
Comments: 9
Kudos: 88
Collections: Jaewin Summer Fic Fest 2020





	Borderline

Being roommates with someone generally means that there is some sort of friendship or positive emotion between both parties, but Jaehyun can’t help but feel like Sicheng hates him. Just a little bit. 

It’s like Sicheng is a cat who’s always there, never speaking, only observing. Jaehyun is also kinda,  _ really _ bad at making friends. He’s handsome, yes. But looks can only get you so far when he can’t even hold a conversation with most people without getting nervous. 

That makes the favor Jaehyun has to ask of Sicheng even more difficult to ask. Last week he got an invitation to his cousin’s wedding. Despite making him feel unsuccessful in the dating world, Jaehyun knew he needed to bring a date to this event. All of his family were going to be there and it’s always so much easier to fend off questions about when he’s gonna settle down if he  _ has a date _ . 

Originally, Jaehyun would have invited Sooyoung to go with him because they at least get along well, but it’s a full weekend away and not only an afternoon. Plus Sooyoung is busy which rules her out completely. So that left Jaehyun with very few possible candidates to have a pretend romantic getaway –if that’s even an appropriate term for a wedding– with. 

Jaehyun’s family is aware of his bisexualness. And aware  _ is _ the correct word because Jaehyun has never dated a guy before, so his family doesn’t really believe he’s actually bi. It’s a pain because at least if Jaehyun was dating a man he wouldn’t keep being asked about pregnancy. 

Yes, his relatives ask him about his plans to have kids in that sort of detail. There would probably be other uncomfortable questions to fend off that he hasn’t thought of, but if he hears the word placenta ever again, he might just lose it. Jaehyun thought about asking Johnny, who’s one of his good friends. But Johnny is  _ really _ straight and his relatives wouldn’t even believe him if he brought Johnny. No offense to Johnny, but he’s terrible at pretending to be gay. Yes, Jaehyun  _ has _ talked to him about this.

But ultimately they both decided that Jaehyun would need to pick someone else. Johnny had suggested Sicheng and Jaehyun was at first very accepting of the idea. Sicheng has multiple pride flags hanging in his room, the classic rainbow one, a pan one and a trans one. So

Sicheng is very queer at the very least. Then Jaehyun started thinking about how he would even ask Sicheng to spend a ‘romantic’ weekend with him and have it not be weird. Sicheng doesn’t know that Jaehyun is bi because after the mess with his family, he’s kept it pretty much on the down low. Johnny and Sooyoung are the only ones who know, and as gay as Sicheng is, Jaehyun might not be picked up by his gaydar. A gay in disguise as they say. 

So currently, with no other options, Jaehyun is hiding behind the couch, watching Sicheng type his paper, hoping for some magical perfect timing to appear, but he’s been sitting here for over thirty five minutes and Sicheng has been typing endlessly. He sighs quietly, careful not to disturb Sicheng’s concentration, except Sicheng’s fingers pause above the keys. There’s this intense silence where Jaehyun is scared to even breathe. Then Sicheng turns his head towards Jaehyun.

“Jaehyun you’ve been hiding back there for over half an hour, what on Earth is going on?” Sicheng asks. Jaehyun lets out his breath and is about to explain everything, but then he looks at Sicheng, eyes just barely above the back of the couch and he panics.

“Nothing!” Jaehyun scrambles up and runs back into his room. Fight or flight mode kicks in and causes Jaehyun to “fly” away at top speed. Feeling nervous, Jaehyun goes into his closet and ducks under his pants. This is embarrassing. Johnny is going to laugh at him, then comfort him, but he’ll laugh first and Jaehyun will 100% deserve it.

“Jaehyun,” Sicheng calls. He knocks once on Jaehyun’s door and walks in, finding Jaehyun easily. “Get out of the closet.”

“No,” Jaehyun replies and Sicheng looks at him.

“Why not?” Sicheng asks, placing his hands on his hips.

“Because I don’t want to,” Jaehyun tries. Sicheng sighs and climbs in next to Jaehyun. There’s several pairs of pants between them, but Jaehyun’s heart can’t stop racing. He hates this feeling. This feeling of being out of control.

“I know we don’t have like bro heart to hearts or anything, but you  _ can _ talk to me about anything you know,” Sicheng says. “Most people don’t race into closets for no reason, so did you wanna like… explain that?”

“I need you to go to a wedding with me,” Jaehyun blurts out. Better out than in?

“Yeah, that’s not what I was expecting at  _ all _ ,” Sicheng replies. “Why don’t you back up a bit? For example, whose wedding is this? Why do  _ I _ need to go? When is it?”

“Okay, yeah… Right, basically, my cousins is getting married this weekend and I need a date because of family reasons and the people I was going to ask are busy, so that kinda just left you, but you make me so nervous because you’re like a cat, which is why I’m asking so last minute and was also hiding behind the couch. Also, it’s like a whole weekend thing and I don’t want to go, but I have to because  _ family _ ,” Jaehyun rambles.

“I see,” Sicheng says. “I’m not busy, so I’d be happy to go with you. I totally get needing someone for family events. I’m not out to most of my family, so I’ll bring a guy with me and everyone asks when he’s gonna get me pregnant.” Jaehyun laughs then puts a hand over his mouth.

“Am I allowed to laugh at that?” Jaehyun asks, worried that he’s now offended Sicheng.

“Yeah, don’t worry.” Sicheng fumbles through the pants that separate them to grab Jaehyun’s hand. “I do have to ask though, just how gay am I supposed to be with you?” This is a great question and an important one, it’s also one Jaehyun doesn’t have an exact answer to.

“Well, we’re sharing a bed, but I can sleep on a couch if it’d make you more comfortable. And, like… I don’t really go to weddings, so I have no idea what is normal. I guess whatever you usually do with your wedding dates we should also do?” Sicheng is being surprisingly cool about this. Even after Jaehyun sorta sprung this on him and Jaehyun totally wouldn’t blame him for deciding that Jaehyun is out of his mind.

“You are not the first straight boy I’ve had to be gay with,” Sicheng says. “Don’t overthink it. As long as you treat me like a normal date, I don’t care.”

“Okay, I can do that.”

* * *

Jaehyun very much can’t do that. The problem is Sicheng is wonderfully handsome up close which Jaehyun hadn’t really anticipated. Being nervous around him had led him to not noticing lots of really likable things about Sicheng.

For example, Sicheng collects Funko Pops and keeps them all over his room. How Jaehyun hadn’t noticed that, he has absolutely no idea. But it’s only made him more nervous around Sicheng. 

Except Sicheng is chalking all of that up to be him being straight and just uncomfortable with male affection. Which is half true, Jaehyun really does have no clue how to respond to affection, but not because he’s  _ straight _ .

“Okay, let me try this again,” Sicheng says, standing in front of Jaehyun. He’s so petite that Jaehyun could easily lift him up which is completely irrelevant to what they are doing, but it’s a distracting thought nonetheless. “Are you ready?”

“As ready as I’ll ever be,” Jaehyun replies. He’s already gone pink from Sicheng’s affection, but doing things over and over has only made it worse. Plus, Sicheng won’t tell him what he’s gonna do. It’s all practice so Jaehyun doesn’t make a fool out of himself in front of his family.

“Perfect.” Sicheng crosses the floor until he’s right in front of Jaehyun before standing on his tiptoes, cupping Jaehyun’s cheek, and pressing a kiss to his nose. Jaehyun feels the blood rush to his face and resists the urge to shove Sicheng away and hide his face in something. “You’re so cute.”

“You’re not making this any easier for me,” Jaehyun whines. Sicheng pokes Jaehyun’s cheek.

“The point isn’t for it to be easy, the point is for you to be able to handle some physical affection and some light kissing. That’s as much as you’ll have to do in front of your family I promise. I’m not gonna French kiss you in front of them don’t worry,” Sicheng reassures, and that’s fine. Great, in fact. Except now Jaehyun is thinking about Sicheng French kissing him.

“I don’t think I can do this,” Jaehyun says and Sicheng shakes his head.

“Nonsense.” Sicheng takes three steps backwards and crosses his arms. “Come show me you love me.” 

Jaehyun sighs, looking at Sicheng, trying to get him to change his mind with his eyes, but Sicheng doesn’t back down. He takes a deep breath; here goes nothing. Jaehyun takes a step towards Sicheng, then another, and finally one more before he’s right in front of him. He hesitates, but still leans in and puts both of his hands on Sicheng’s waist, letting his mouth come closer and closer to Sicheng’s until they are only two inches apart.

“I can’t do this,” Jaehyun blurts out, letting go of Sicheng and running into his room.

* * *

Ultimately, they can’t make their way up to mouth kissing, but Jaehyun can now hold Sicheng’s hand, hug him and kiss his cheek without issue, so it should be enough. Jaehyun packs his bags and helps Sicheng pack his, practicing what Sicheng calls ‘casual touching’ as they go.

Finally Friday comes around and Jaehyun feels so anxious. Sicheng calms him down before they get in the car, Jaehyun chooses to drive because he finds it relaxing and because he’s the one that dragged Sicheng along on this trip to begin with, so it would be rude to make him drive.

Jaehyun drives with the windows down and lets Sicheng play music during the trip. Sicheng sings along with the voice of a bird, having a blast even if he’s the only one who knows the words.

Eventually a song Jaehyun knows comes on and he can’t help but sing along.

When the song ends, Sicheng turns down the volume and looks at Jaehyun. He places his hand on the center console dramatically before speaking.

“I had no idea you could sing,” Sicheng says. “I can’t believe you kept your voice locked away.”

“I’m not that good,” Jaehyun deflects.

“Bullshit!” Sicheng exclaims. “You sound so good. Now tell me your favorite songs so I can listen to you sing them.” Jaehyun finds himself shy once again, having Sicheng’s undivided attention has a way of making all the butterflies in his stomach act up.

So reluctantly, Jaehyun lists out his favorite songs and true to his word, Sicheng plays them, praising Jaehyun about his singing voice after each one. At least Jaehyun knows he’s sincere because if he didn’t like the way Jaehyun sounds he wouldn’t insist on listening to him sing.

And that’s how they wrap up the drive. Jaehyun pulls up in front of the villa where they’re supposed to be staying and Sicheng gives a whistle in approval.

“If you had told me this is where we would be staying, I would have agreed  _ so _ much faster,” Sicheng teases.

“You agreed immediately though,” Jaehyun counters.

“Potato, potato,” Sicheng replies, climbing out of the car. “Let's go in.” They grab their bags and get keys from the main building before walking over to their specific villa.

It’s a single bedroom villa which Jaehyun isn’t surprised about, but it’s still full of plenty of things that Sicheng adores. There’s a bathtub big enough for three people, a huge vanity, and a view of the lake. Jaehyun sets his things down on one side of the bed, taking in the room himself. Everything is in shades of tan and brown, but it’s essentially a hotel.

“I love this place,” Sicheng announces, exiting the bathroom. His stuff lays in a pile by the door and he flops onto the bed next to Jaehyun. “Do we have plans for dinner? Because if not I’m ordering room service and eating in the bathtub.” Jaehyun can’t help but burst out laughing at Sicheng’s comment.

“I don’t think they have room service in villas, but there should be some restaurants round here. We can go get food there. I’m not sure if they’ll have bathtubs for you to eat in,” Jaehyun replies with a smile. Sicheng pouts, looking up at Jaehyun. “Pouting at  _ me _ won’t make restaurants have bathtubs in them.”

“Okay, but imagine if that worked,” Sicheng says. “That would be absolutely wild. It would also be much appreciated by me.”

“Lets go and get dinner.” Jaehyun climbs off the bed and Sicheng nearly rolls off, but gets off in one piece in the end.

“Whoop!”

Dinner is easy with Sicheng, he’s so busy gushing about food, being the most animated Jaehyun’s seen him since the two of them became roommates. He manages to avoid saying things to make Jaehyun blush, all the way through until dessert. 

Jaehyun isn’t huge on sweets, so he passes, but Sicheng orders a slice of chocolate strawberry cake.

It arrives and it looks beyond good. Pretty enough to be it’s own Instagram post, but Sicheng doesn’t bother with a photo and takes a bite immediately. Sicheng takes four bites before looking at Jaehyun.

He scoops up a bite of cake on his fork and Jaehyun can already see where this is going.

“No, thank you,” Jaehyun says. “It’s your cake, enjoy it.” Sicheng completely ignores him.

“Babe,” Sicheng whines, holding out the fork in front of him. The word slips out with no thought at all and Jaehyun stares at him. “Open up.”

Jaehyun opens his mouth slowly and Sicheng sticks the fork in. Sicheng was right, this cake is delicious.

“Okay fine, this is really good cake,” Jaehyun admits and Sicheng hums, wiggling in his chair as some form of happy dance.

“Do you want another bite?” Sicheng asks.

“Yeah.” Sicheng holds out the fork again and tries to take it himself, but Sicheng tsks him. “You’re a pain.”

“I’m aware,” Sicheng replies and Jaehyun takes the fork into his mouth again. They wrap up dinner and Jaehyun insists on paying. After five minutes of bickering, Sicheng concedes and lets him pay.

When they get back to the room, both of them realize just how tired they are, so Sicheng starts to take his clothes off to put on pajamas.

Jaehyun looks away, but notices that Sicheng has something around his chest that looks almost like a really small shirt.

“Can I ask a dumb question?” Jaehyun asks.

“What if I can answer it without you even asking?” Sicheng counters.

“That would be impressive, but yeah, do that.” Jaehyun reaches into his own suitcase and pulls out a pair of pajamas, tugging his shirt off and buttoning up the pajama one.

“The thing I’m wearing is my binder. I know you know I’m trans, but I haven’t had top surgery yet, so I still have boobs. They’re pretty small, so wearing this flattens out my chest completely and makes me look and feel a little more masculine,” Sicheng explains.

“That's very cool then,” Jaehyun replies, pulling his pajama pants on. “Can I look yet?”

“You could have looked the whole time,” Sicheng replies, causing Jaehyun to blush yet again. “I’m not self conscious. I’m aware of what my body looks like and I don’t care if you’re aware too. But yes, I’m not naked.” 

Jaehyun turns back skeptically, but seeing Sicheng really is dressed, he grabs his bathroom bag and heads in there to brush his teeth.

“You strike me as someone who enjoys brushing your teeth,” Sicheng says when he walks in. Jaehyun spits and gives Sicheng a curious look. “I don’t have an explanation for that, it’s just your vibes.” Sicheng pulls out his own toothbrush and starts brushing his teeth while

Jaehyun washes his face. They finish about the same time and Jaehyun flicks off the lights while Sicheng goes to get comfortable under the covers.

“So… Am I sleeping next to you?” Jaehyun asks. “Because I really don’t want to make you uncomfortable.”

“Oh, shut up and climb in,” Sicheng replies. That’s certainly one way to answer, Jaehyun supposes, flicking off the overhead lights. He slips under the covers and lays facing the ceiling. “You  _ are _ allowed to get comfortable, you know.”

“How do you always know when I’m uncomfortable?” Jaehyun asks.

“It’s called being a psychic.” Jaehyun snorts and Sicheng reaches over and gives Jaehyun a poke on the chest. “I’m serious, now go to sleep.”

Jaehyun doesn’t say anything else, curling up and letting himself drift off.

* * *

The practice wedding as Sicheng calls it, could have gone better. As Jaehyun was expecting there were lots of inappropriate questions, the worst of which relating to who tops and bottoms in the bedroom which is... Well it’s  _ something _ . 

Sicheng managed to deflect the question – _ thank god–  _ because Jaehyun was absolutely  _ mortified _ that someone would even ask him a question like that.

Which is why Jaehyun is so glad that the actual wedding ceremony goes so much smoother than the night before. There’s no rude or personal questions, everyone had gotten enough of Jaehyun yesterday and are now much more focused on the bride. Which is how it _ should be _ to be honest.

Sicheng ends up catching the bouquet and everyone cheers when he places a kiss on Jaehyun’s cheek. After people eat, Sicheng and Jaehyun linger at their table for a while. They are both done eating, but are not making any move to get on the dance floor.

“Jaehyun,” Sicheng says, elbow on the table with his hand holding up his face.

“I already know what you’re going to say,” Jaehyun interrupts. Sicheng is going to encourage Jaehyun to dance with him, but Jaehyun can’t really dance. Technically he knows how to waltz, but even  _ that _ is debatable.

“Oh really?” Sicheng asks. “Tell me then. I love having my mind read.”

Jaehyun shoots him a glare, but gives in anyway. “I can’t dance.”

“That wasn’t what I was thinking, but I see where you got that,” Sicheng replies. “And before you ask, I was thinking about how nice you look in that tux.” Jaehyun blushes and resists hiding himself in a napkin or under the table.

“Moving on—”

“But we should totally dance together,” Sicheng interrupts. “Hear me out!”

“Okay, fine.” Jaehyun sighs, he has no idea what argument Sicheng is going to make, but he’s almost positive that Sicheng will convince him anyway. The music changes and a slow song comes on.

“Slow dancing is just swaying back and forth, which I know you can do, so take my hand and dance with me,” Sicheng says. He stands up and holds his hand out to Jaehyun who’s heart skips a beat seeing Sicheng under the soft lights and smiling down at him.

“Why do you make it impossible to say no?” Jaehyun mumbles, standing up and taking Sicheng’s hand who pulls him onto the edge of the dance floor.

“I’ll lead so put your hands on my shoulders and mine go around your waist,” Sicheng explains. Jaehyun does as instructed and Sicheng adjusts him a little bit before putting his hands on Jaehyun’s waist. “Now we sway.”

They’re quiet as they dance, staying in their corner of the dance floor, having a good time without trying to dance like the rest of the people there. The moment is honestly a pure one, one filled with strong feelings of care and adoration for the other. But the moment is broken by Jaehyun’s mom.

“I’m really sorry to interrupt, but I knew I had to tell you this now before I back out,” she says. Jaehyun shifts his attention to his mom, letting go of Sicheng.

“Is something wrong?” Jaehyun asks, already assuming the worst. “No, nothing is wrong, I wanted to apologize to you though.” What would his mom apologize about? Jaehyun racks his brain for a moment and can’t think of anything. 

“I’m sorry for doubting that you’re actually bisexual. Sicheng is truly lovely and you’re really lucky to have him.” Jaehyun freezes. There’s so many thoughts racing through his mind all at once. Sicheng doesn’t know he’s bi. His mom accepts him. His mom really believes that they are dating.

“I’m so glad you accept Jaehyun,” Sicheng says, taking over for Jaehyun who still hasn’t found the words to respond. “I’m lucky to have him too. You raised a really wonderful son.” Jaehyun’s mom smiles. She’s clearly out of her comfort zone and Jaehyun admires her for saying anything.

“Thank you, mom. I love you,” Jaehyun says finally, throat feeling tight. She rubs Jaehyun’s shoulder for a moment before leaving. Jaehyun looks at Sicheng whose expression is unreadable. He doesn’t look upset, but Jaehyun feels guilt filling his gut like lead. 

Jaehyun turns around and speed walks out of the ballroom, leaving Sicheng behind, but he couldn’t stay in that room any longer. He looks for the nearest exit and finds himself outside. There’s a sidewalk around the outside of the building, but there’s grass outside of that, and on the grass is an arbor bench swing. He makes a beeline for it, anything to feel a bit more space.

Sitting down, Jaehyun stares out at the seemingly endless grass. They are in the countryside, far away from anything besides the wedding venue. Jaehyun almost wishes he were back in his apartment, but he can’t go back so there’s no use in dwelling on that.

“It’s okay, you know,” Sicheng says, taking a seat next to Jaehyun on the bench swing. He had been so absorbed in his thoughts that Jaehyun didn’t notice Sicheng approaching. “I’m not mad at you for not telling me.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, I’m just bewildered if anything because if I knew you were a shy bi guy I would have been a lot easier on you,” Sicheng admits. “I really thought I made you uncomfortable.”

“Then why did you even come?” Jaehyun asks.

“Because I’ve liked you for months and I saw this as a chance to sort of live out my dream fantasy of dating you without any of the pressure. Also because you wanted me to. If you had asked me to stop, I would have, but you kept trying, at least for the sake of convincing your family,” Sicheng explains. Jaehyun sits there, a little dumbfounded. 

“Well, you being handsome and likable didn’t make things any easier,” Jaehyun says. He stares at his hands, refusing to look at Sicheng, but Sicheng takes one of Jaehyun’s hands and presses a kiss to the back of it.

“You don’t need to try and soften the blow for me.” Sicheng lets out a breath. “I got my week with you and now it’s over. That’s okay.” 

“But I don’t want it to end,” Jaehyun blurts out, lifting up his head to look at Sicheng who’s eyes widen.

“Are you saying...” Sicheng trails off and Jaehyun swallows down his nerves.

“I’m saying that you’re a really cool guy who I would be lucky to date.” Jaehyun bites his lip. “I really really like you and I think it would be really cool if you let me kiss you.”

“For realsies this time?” Sicheng smiles and Jaehyun does too, even though he can feel the tips of his ears turning pink.

“Yeah.” Jaehyun leans over, puts his hand on Sicheng’s shoulder and lets his lips connect with his. For a moment, it’s only them, no wedding, no family, no lying. Merely two boys who hope to find love in each other. Fireworks shoot off in Jaehyun’s chest, allowing Sicheng to deepen the kiss. Jaehyun, despite his lack of experience in the kissing department, does his best to show Sicheng just how much he means to him through the art of French kissing.

When their kiss ends, neither of them saying anything, only looking at one another, soft smiles on their faces, illuminated by the outdoor lights and heated the warm coming from within.

**Author's Note:**

> [Twitter](https://twitter.com/occultclysms)   
>  [Curious Cat](https://curiouscat.qa/carrotyeol)


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